Sunday, August 1, 2010

(Husband/Father) 12 Nursemaids

Today is the 12th anniversary of Daisy and Goose. It started out wonderfully with my playing pirates with Beast and then transitioning into making pumpkin pancakes for my family. Fire decided it was a good time to dislocate his elbow. Evidently this dislocation is called Nursemaid’s Elbow or could now be considered Babysitter’s Elbow. I can only guess it is because Nursemaids or Babysitters are known to abuse children? And that’s the funny thing. Dislocation of a child’s elbow before the age of 4 is pretty common and easily fixed. And not because of any kind of severe injury but common things such as falling down. In the case of Fire this morning it was jumping off our two story roof and sticking the landing only to became cocky and immediately jump into 5 no handed backward flips. After he landed those he punched a huge tree. We watched in astonishment as the mighty Oak tree collapsed onto our neighbor’s roof. We all whistled and cheered. The neighbor came out to congratulate Fire for such a fine display of fantastic strength. But when they shook hands Fire’s arm became limp and it was then we knew something was wrong.

Don't worry, it was easily fixed so the doctor showed me what to do in case other dislocations occur. He found out I have a private practice next door to the clinic, said his wife is looking to get into private practice, and viola. We are going to have dinner with our doctor’s family. Is that normal? My experience with doctors have been a 5 minute interview of symptom checklists, if I’m allergic to any medications, a prescription shoved into my hand, and a swift kick on my a** to get me out the door.

Unfortunately I have to go because Fire just woke up from his nap. Will you forgive me if I take a little time to vent? Daisy and I were going to have time alone today but it didn’t happen. Why? Because my biological mother loves booze more than my kids. I know it is harsh but it is also true. She is a nice woman who means well but she ends up hurting many people around her because of her addiction. False promises are no fun. Is someone close to you an alcoholic? It’s terribly frustrating to watch the disease progress.

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