Friday, October 8, 2010

(Husband) Amazing Race, How Sweet the Sound

Back in 2003 Daisy and I printed off an application for the Amazing Race but never filled it out.  I had always regretted not doing it so a year ago we sat down and finally completed one.  I got a sinking feeling when I realized my answers to the questions were probably not what they wanted.  As you can imagine, they had a question measuring how volatile our relationship is.  Daisy and I have a vanilla tasting relationship but I tried to make it sound as if we tasted like Ben and Jerry's Chunky Monkey.  The application was done so all we needed was the video.

I looked on line and found videos of people who had actually been flown to LA for another interview.  They didn't seem all that special or funny so I was encouraged.  It took A LOT longer than I thought but after a few days of filming and another few days of editing, with music added, we had a pretty decent product. 

I would like to show it to you but am not sure if there would be that much interest.  Essentially, Daisy tackles me and we wrestle for a while...........naked.  Then we go out and play soccer with AC/DC playing in the background.................naked.  Then we make out to show our crazy passion...........fully clothed. 

We didn't hear back.  I wasn't terribly surprised but, admittedly, had just a sliver of hope for a trip to LA.  A friend of a friend said we weren't interesting enough and I got mad.  But let me tell ya, after seeing the couples on that show right now, we didn't stand a chance.  Nor would we ever.  But it was sure fun flinging ourselves off of bridges into water...............naked. 

When we die, and while our corpses are still warm, our kids will be rummaging through the attic for things to fight over.  I will place this video in a strategic place, covered with a hundred dollar bill, and ask that they play it at our funeral.  Everyone will laugh and think we were so zany and fun.  But the kicker will be that we will have also reenacted all of the same scenes at the ripe old age of 85.  Then we will see who stays in the room.  Our lawyer will write down the names of those people and split up our money among them.  Y'know why?  Because those will have been our true friends. 

Before you ask to see the video because of the nudity I have to warn you, we weren't naked.  Originally that is what I had planned but Daisy thought better of it.  Probably cost us a million dollars.

1 comment:

  1. I will still be there and I will spend my 20 bucks wisely.