Sunday, September 26, 2010

(Husband) Ring Ring Go Away


My ring is stuck on my finger.  At first I thought,"Oh, my finger is a little swollen right now.  I'll try again later." Well, later came and it still didn't come off.  Then I thought, "What does it really matter?  It's not like it feels uncomfortable."  Well, later it did feel uncomfortable because I realized I didn't have a choice in the matter. 

I told Daisy who asked, "Why would you want your ring off?"  Fair question. 

"I don't know. It's starting to bother me that I don't have the choice.  And with that, my inability to choose wants me want it off all the more."

I tried the grimace and pull method. 

I then tried the lotion and pull method.

I then my finger in cold ice water for ten minutes and then pulled.

Daisy's friend visited, we talked, had a few beers, she plastic wrapped my finger, virgin oiled the plastic wrap, and twisted/pulled until my finger turned white.

I visited a friend of mine, we watched the game, had a few beers, he weaved dental floss around my finger, twist/pull, and my finger turned purple.

Granted, I've gained a few pounds but not enough to make my digits little sausages.  Any suggestions or do I have to get this cut off by a jeweler?

5 comments:

  1. My husband has had some success with Windex!

    Tawna

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  2. Hm. see if you can get a waterpill to get rid of the extra fluids in your body.

    slather your finger with Dawn?

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  3. Soak your hand in ice water (while hand is elevated above your heart). Then apply K-Y Jelly (most slippery substance on the plant).

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  4. That was supposed to read "planet"

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  5. Tawna - I read that on "the net" but thought they must have just watched "My Big Fat Greek Wedding"

    Keri - With my job, I have to hold "it" for at least 50 minutes. What the hell? I'll do it. Need a good cleansing.

    Buddy - I understand the ice water and elevation but what is it about Kentucky being slippery and the state being a plant? Wait, Kentucky being a planet? I suppose I have heard that from visitors. Are you saying I need to go there to get my ring off? Do you get a choice as to what flavor of Jelly?

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