Sunday, September 26, 2010

(Husband) Ring Ring Go Away

My ring is stuck on my finger.  At first I thought,"Oh, my finger is a little swollen right now.  I'll try again later." Well, later came and it still didn't come off.  Then I thought, "What does it really matter?  It's not like it feels uncomfortable."  Well, later it did feel uncomfortable because I realized I didn't have a choice in the matter. 

I told Daisy who asked, "Why would you want your ring off?"  Fair question. 

"I don't know. It's starting to bother me that I don't have the choice.  And with that, my inability to choose wants me want it off all the more."

I tried the grimace and pull method. 

I then tried the lotion and pull method.

I then my finger in cold ice water for ten minutes and then pulled.

Daisy's friend visited, we talked, had a few beers, she plastic wrapped my finger, virgin oiled the plastic wrap, and twisted/pulled until my finger turned white.

I visited a friend of mine, we watched the game, had a few beers, he weaved dental floss around my finger, twist/pull, and my finger turned purple.

Granted, I've gained a few pounds but not enough to make my digits little sausages.  Any suggestions or do I have to get this cut off by a jeweler?


  1. My husband has had some success with Windex!


  2. Hm. see if you can get a waterpill to get rid of the extra fluids in your body.

    slather your finger with Dawn?

  3. Soak your hand in ice water (while hand is elevated above your heart). Then apply K-Y Jelly (most slippery substance on the plant).

  4. That was supposed to read "planet"

  5. Tawna - I read that on "the net" but thought they must have just watched "My Big Fat Greek Wedding"

    Keri - With my job, I have to hold "it" for at least 50 minutes. What the hell? I'll do it. Need a good cleansing.

    Buddy - I understand the ice water and elevation but what is it about Kentucky being slippery and the state being a plant? Wait, Kentucky being a planet? I suppose I have heard that from visitors. Are you saying I need to go there to get my ring off? Do you get a choice as to what flavor of Jelly?