Monday, May 2, 2011

(Father) Mad Libs

Fire is my little two year old who will be turning three this month.  He has always been rather verbal which has been a lot of fun.  However, he has shown some verbal aggression that has us frowning in concern.  I think it all started when I would be frustrated with the children but not so much to the point where I needed to issue a time-out.  I would tease them in order to distract myself, and the boys, from whatever they may be fighting about.  For instance, "If you guys don't stop I'm going to throw you both over the fence so the wolves will get you."  At first they would be scared but then they would see the smile on my face.  Beast was always the spokesperson asking, "Are you teasing us?"  I would say yes, we would all laugh, and then move on to whatever we were doing.  Throughout the day one of the boys might laugh and say, "Your not going to throw us over the fence!"  I would say yes, take a step toward them, and they would run away. 

But then Fire began following his own instincts rather than taking his cues from Beast.  You see, Beast runs away from conflict and enjoys being chased.  I soon found that Fire stands his ground and attacks if threatened.  Simple Flight and Flight theory.  So you can imagine my surprise when the day finally came for Fire to show his true self. 

"Your not going to throw us over the fence!"  Beast said.

"Yes I am!"  I took a step toward them and Beast ran away.  Fire did not.  In fact, he turned to face me as if it was high noon at the O.K. Corral.  "I'm going to get you Fire!" and took a jab step toward him.  He frowned. 

"AAAUUUGGGHHH!!!!"  Fire ran at me while swinging his arms in a rather violent fashion.  He finally reached me and began pounding his fists into my knees.  I didn't know what to do.  He stopped, took a step back, and pointed his index finger toward my my face.  "I'm going to throw you in the mud!"  He proceeded to start where he had left off.  Swinging his right arm, then his left, then his right, and his left. 

I knelt down and deflected his little punches.  I lowered my voice to almost a whisper and repeated, "Fire, it's ok.  It's ok Fire" until he calmed. 

"I'm going to get you daddy."  It was said as more of a fact than a threat.  And not said as if it would happen presently but more of something in the future.  Kind of like, "You may have won this time Superman but I'll be back!!"

" about a snack."

"Yeah!!! A snack!!!" Beast yelled as he ran out of the room.  Fire was caught up in the enthusiasm and ran to the table as well.  As if nothing significant happened.  They both sat, smiling at me as I retrieved the crackers and cheese.  I occasionally looked at Fire to see if there was some remaining anger lingering.  If there was it was quite hidden.  Y'know, behind the "Please" and "Thank You".

Indeed, he has since brought out this little Fire demon.  The reason Mad Libs was such a fun game was because you could come up with different words to a story as prompted by the underlined suggestion.  It's not hard to come up with what Fire's standard threats are.

I'm going to ______________  you in the ___________.
                     (violent action)                        (body part)

Go ahead and try it.  Pinch, punch, grab.   Face, arm, knee.  It doesn't matter what you come up with it's still the same.  Daisy and I have a hard time not laughing because he is such a little guy who could do no harm.  Most of the time he is just playing a part such as a ninja, darth vader, or knight.  Or he is about to go do something fun, and has so much adrenaline he doesn't know how to contain it.  Speaking of the devil he just woke up from his nap. 

If he continues this behavior 13 yrs from now it won't be so cute.  Maybe an outlet like football or something............well, I'll let you know what happens.

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